Congratulations to Pippa Middleton for her nuptials this weekend! The wedding looked amazing and the dress she had on was absolutely gorgeous.

Reading about her nuptials made me think about how as little girls we dream of the day that we get to walk down an aisle, dressed in the most beautiful wedding dress we could find, and the groom (our protector, cover-er, and Boo) is standing at the opposite end waiting to embark on a journey where two become one.

From the flowers to the venue—brides all over the world want one thing, “The Prefect Wedding”. The prefect wedding invitations, food, and cake are all important. However, how often do you hear during the process of planning and prepping for the big day a bride expressing them wanting their marriage to be fruitful, prosperous, and everlasting (besides during the wedding vows)? For the most part the primary focus is on “The Wedding“. Who will be attending the wedding, where will the wedding be held, what type of cake will they have, what kind of gifts will they request; the list goes on and on.
What about the marriage? What happen when the last guest leaves the wedding? What happens they day after? How will they move past the engagement experience to the wedding excitement, and now a wife? These are powerful questions to ask oneself. The most important question is do you want the wedding or the marriage?

The Wedding

The wedding day can be the most exciting day of a bride’s life. It’s a day where the bride get to retire her single hat. It’s a day that a bride is surrounded by her family and friends to showcase her uniting with her husband. It’s a day that every bride maps out detail by detail as to how perfect it should be.

The wedding is the day where a bride can hold up her left hand proudly and say with pride, “I’s married now” and celebrate the day that she stops hearing the questions, “When are you going to get married?”, “Why aren’t you married yet?”, and the most famous question of them all, “Why are you still single?”

The wedding day is full of laughter, joy, excitement, and from what my friends tell me a blur. I have been told by quite a few people that they don’t remember what happened during their wedding day. With the overwhelming excitement of the day, going from one extreme to another, and completely passing out afterwards— they don’t remember a thing.
I know that I’ll be excited about that day when I enter into that season, however my focus today is “The Marriage”. I’m choosing the marriage and not the wedding. Why got caught up with one day, when I have a lifetime and legacy to build with my husband in our marriage?

The Marriage 

The marriage is a lifetime, a bond between husband and wife, and a secret union of love, friendship, and trust. The marriage has its highs and it has its lows, but it memorable and not a blur. Through the trails and tribulations that life brings, the marriage helps you grow and learn skills that you would’ve been able to achieve on your own (single).

When looking at marriages in my single season, I can’t help but take this time and learn and grow from the successes and failures of the marriages I have been exposed to. This is the time where I look at marriages in the way God intended them to be. This is time to focus on being and becoming a wife.
Often times women marry excepting to become wives after the wedding, when in fact we should already be in our process of becoming one in our single-hood. Proverbs 18:22 reads, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” How can he find you, if you’re not cultivating yourself on being a wife? And if you’re not focused on becoming a wife, you’ll get caught up on the hoopla of “The Wedding” and miss the most important part; which is the marriage.
Just may random thoughts. I choose “The Marriage”! Marriage is an intimate union between a man and a woman, and it definitely won’t be a blur. Unless you marry someone you had NO business marrying…that’s for an post.